Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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