Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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