I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
