Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
