I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
