i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
