Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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