therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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