The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Damn victory sex feels great
Randomize
