I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
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