watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Randomize
