I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
