I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize
