Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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