the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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