woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
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