Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Randomize
