Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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