Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Randomize
