The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
