It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize