new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
