I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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