You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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