Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
