did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
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