What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
