That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
