did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
