i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
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