fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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