You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I'm too high and old for this...
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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