But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
