Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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