is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
My cat gives me a boner
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Randomize