I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize