Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
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