That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
What a dumb baby whore.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
