Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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