I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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