You can't special order awesome
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
