I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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