I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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