I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
