dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
