the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Randomize