im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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