question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
