We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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