from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
