i wish peter jackson would direct porn
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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