just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
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