If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
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